From July 6th of last year to around mid-October, I made huge changes in my diet and exercise routine (which had been mostly slim to none before that). I started running with the Couch to 5k app, cut out processed carbs for the most part, and lost 28 pounds, ran a 5k trail run, and was training for a 10k.

Then I hit some kind of mental wall, and it all fell apart, including an injury around the time of the 10k that left me unable to run for 3 months. I completed the Cowtown Half-Marathon at the end of February—mostly walking it, since I’d just been released by my doctor—and beat my previous half-marathon time (almost entirely walking) by about 25 minutes. I bough a treadmill, and named him Forrest.

But I have not been able to get my mind straight to be consistent with working out and eating right. I’ve gained 17 pounds back. My running endurance is gone. I’m tired all the time.

And I have another half-marathon in November, the Route 66.

I know set-backs happen, and although I’m disappointed in myself for the backwards trend, I know it’s not the end of the world. I’ve also been struggling with a depression flare-up. It’s hard when you feel like everyone has taken themselves out of your life and you don’t matter to them anymore. I’ve had enough of being the only person putting any effort into the relationships, and it just makes me more tired, so I’m done with that.

I’m turning over a new leaf.

This week, I got in four cardio workouts, plus two mini strength training sessions. My cardio looked like this:

Only a mile each, but one of them took place before work, at 2:30 in the morning. Yeah, I’m questioning that decision myself. That may or may not happen again.

I’m planning on upping my mileage to try to play catch up with my training plan this week. And healthy eating. (Meal prepping already in progress.)

Time to reverse the trend.

Onward and upward.